Every Woman a Mother

Motherhood is a high calling for all women — whether single, married, fertile or infertile

In an August 2013 TIME feature, "The Childfree Life: Having It All Without Having Children," writer Lauren Sandler introduces a woman named Laura Scott. At age 14, Scott decided never to have children. She describes her mother as "bone tired," working long hours while raising Scott and her brother. It was a lifestyle Scott didn't want to mimic.

"My main motive not to have kids was that I loved my life the way it was," Scott explains.

Now at 50, Scott is married, has enjoyed a career as an author and filmmaker — currently working on a documentary called Childless by Choice — and says she is "fulfilled."

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The Mindset List: 2017 List

When the Class of 2017 arrives on campus this fall, these digital natives will already be well-connected to each other. They are more likely to have borrowed money for college than their Boomer parents were, and while their parents foresee four years of school, the students are pretty sure it will be longer than that. Members of this year’s first year class, most of them born in 1995, will search for the academic majors reported to lead to good-paying jobs, and most of them will take a few courses taught at a distant university by a professor they will never meet.




The use of smart phones in class may indicate they are reading the assignment they should have read last night, or they may be recording every minute of their college experience…or they may be texting the person next to them. If they are admirers of Steve Jobs and Bill Gates, they may wonder whether a college degree is all it’s cracked up to be, even as their dreams are tempered by the reality that tech geniuses come along about as often as Halley’s Comet, which they will not glimpse until they reach what we currently consider “retirement age.”

Though they have never had the chicken pox, they are glad to have access to health insurance for a few more years.

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Are You a Part-Time Churchgoer? You May Be Surprised – Trevin Wax

Geoff and Christine are thirty-something churchgoers who love Jesus and love their three kids. They consider themselves faithful members of New Life Community Church.


Their oldest is about to be in the youth group, and their youngest is finally out of diapers. Christine has been involved in the kids’ ministry through the years. Geoff is a deacon.

But they are part-timers when it comes to church attendance, and they never set out to be.

They are not alone.

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Michael Gerson: Saying goodbye to my child, the youngster - The Washington Post

Saying goodbye to my child, the youngster


Eventually, the cosmologists assure us, our sun and all suns will consume their fuel, violently explode and then become cold and dark. Matter itself will evaporate into the void and the universe will become desolate for the rest of time.

This was the general drift of my thoughts as my wife and I dropped off my eldest son as a freshman at college. I put on my best face. But it is the worst thing that time has done to me so far. That moment at the dorm is implied at the kindergarten door, at the gates of summer camp, at every ritual of parting and independence. But it comes as surprising as a thief, taking what you value most.

MORE: Michael Gerson: Saying goodbye to my child, the youngster - The Washington Post

The damning euphemism called “selective reduction” | Denny Burk

The video above features a woman named Amy Richards telling her story about “selective reduction” (HT: @drmoore). If you are unfamiliar with the term, it’s a euphemism for killing one or more unborn babies when there are multiples in a womb. In Richards’ case, she found out that she was pregnant with triplets. In the video above, she describes her fateful decision to have two of her triplets killed. In a 2004 Op-Ed for The New York Times, she describes why she refused to allow all of her children to live: MORE: The damning euphemism called “selective reduction” | Denny Burk

4 Goals to Pursue in Parenting by William Boekestein | Ligonier Ministries Blog

Near the end of Colossians 3 God speaks his will to people who play a role in six different relationships; Wives, husbands, children, fathers, bondservants, and masters. Only to fathers does God NOT speak a positive command. He simply says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged” (Col. 3:21). Perhaps by doing so, God is accentuating the uniquely devastating problem of parental provocation. Still, Ephesians 6:4 teaches us that there is a clear alternative to provocative parenting. MORE: 4 Goals to Pursue in Parenting by William Boekestein | Ligonier Ministries Blog

AlbertMohler.com – On Second Thought — Why Mother’s Day is a Bad Idea

Now that Mother’s Day for 2009 is over, perhaps a bit of second-guessing is in order. Americans have celebrated Mother’s Day for over a century, and the observance has grown to become one of the nation’s most popular annual events. But is it good for motherhood?
Back in 1858, Anna Reeves Jarvis organized the precursor to Mother’s Day as a way to protest a lack of sanitation in rural Appalachia. Later, Julia Ward Howe would organize what became “Mother’s Days for Peace” in protest of all war. Howe, who wrote the “Battle Hymn of the Republic,” pledged: “Our husbands shall not come to us reeking with carnage. . . . Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn all that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy, and patience.” MORE:  AlbertMohler.com – On Second Thought — Why Mother’s Day is a Bad Idea

Grace-Based Parenting vs. Fear-Based Parenting

(Tim Kimmel)
From Tim Kimmel’s chapter “The Freedom to Make Mistakes” in his book Grace-Based Parenting:

Legalistic parents maintain a relationship with God through obedience to a standard. The goal of this when it comes to their children is to keep sin from getting into their home. They do their best to create an environment that controls as many of the avenues as possible that sin could use to work its way into the inner sanctum. . . . It’s as though the power to sin or not to sin was somehow connected to their personal will power and resolve. . . . These families are preoccupied with keeping sin out by putting a fence between them and the world. 

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Daughters and Dad’s Approval

(Wall Street Journal) "It's no secret that the past few decades have transformed traditional gender relationships. Both men and women are operating by a whole new set of rules.
Given the depth of the change, you might expect a dramatic alteration in one of the most fundamental male-female relationships: the one between dads and daughters.
In my research into the lives of some 75 high-achieving, clearly independent women, I knew that I would find a powerful connection between them and the first men in their lives. Many other studies have confirmed it. What surprised me was how deep (and surprisingly traditional) the bond is, how powerful it remains throughout their lives, and how resilient it can be—even when a father has caused it grievous harm..."
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Failure is Not an Option: The Problem with Overprotective Parenting

(By: Collin Hansen) 

"Your kids will fail. This is both inevitable and also necessary. Apparently not many parents today want to hear this uncomfortable fact. And they certainly don’t want to implement it in how they discipline their children. Writing the cover story for The Atlantic’s July/August issue, therapist Lori Gottlieb alerts us that the cult of self-esteem is ruining our kids. Convinced they are the center of the universe and capable of anything, our children have become insufferable narcissists. Then, when these kids grow up and fail, as they must, they head for the nearest therapist, worried their lives have gone horribly wrong. Gottlieb writes:
....Rates of anxiety and depression have also risen in tandem with self-esteem. Why is this? “Narcissists are happy when they’re younger, because they’re the center of the universe,” [psychology professor Jean] Twenge explains. “Their parents act like their servants, shuttling them to any activity they choose and catering to their every desire. Parents are constantly telling their children how special and talented they are. This gives them an inflated view of their specialness compared to other human beings. Instead of feeling good about themselves, they feel better than everyone else.”" MORE:

Raising Girls

4 Cultural Challenges to Raising Little Girls (Braxton Hunter)

"EVANSVILLE, Ind. (BP)--As we left the ultrasound room I encountered a strange cocktail of emotions. On the one hand I realized that unless Sarah and I have another child, and unless that child is male, my brother and his wife will have the last shot at continuing the family name. On the other hand WE'RE HAVING A BABY GIRL! So, you see my dilemma?...."

Parenting 001

Parenting 001 (Kevin DeYoung)

"Does it seem like parenting has gotten more complicated? I mean, as far as I can tell, back in the day parents basically tried to feed their kids, clothe them, and keep them away from explosives. Now our kids have to sleep on their backs (no wait, their tummies; no never mind, their backs), while listening to Baby Mozart surrounded by scenes of Starry, Starry Night. They have to be in piano lessons before they are five and can’t leave the car seat until they’re about five foot six...."

Teach Kids Media Discernment (Walt Mueller)
There's been lots of talk and buzz concerning MTV's controversial teen drama, Skins. In perfect world we wouldn't be talking about Skins because it wouldn't exist. In a near-perfect world we would be able to step into our kids' lives and simply tell them to turn it off, or don't turn it on in the first place. . . and they would gladly listen knowing that we had their best interests in mind. But the fact of the matter is that we don't live a perfect world. So what do we do? That last question is my cue (given by me) to trumpet our need to teach our kids to think critically and Christianly for themselves about their media choices. . . a skill that will serve them well both now and for the rest of their lives....

The Truth About Men and Church (Robbie Low)
Most of us, I suspect, are not great students of “the small print.” We employ lawyers and accountants because we recognize that carefully constructed small print may contain disclaimers, definitions, and information that effectively drive a coach and horses through our assumptions about the general argument and make utterly null and void the common understanding that we thought we had. Allow me to introduce you to a piece of very small print....

The Dangerous Worlds of Analog Parents with Digital Teens (Al Mohler)

Sunday’s edition of The New York Times gave front-page attention to the problem of adolescent bullying on the Internet. There can be no question that the Internet and the explosion of social media have facilitated the arrival of a new and deeply sinister form of bullying, and the consequences for many teenagers are severe. For some, life becomes a horror story of insults, rumors, slanders, and worse.

Sociological Insights on the American Family (Center for Marriage and Families)

Briefs on parenting topics

Dangers Facing Over-churched Kids (Ministry to Children) "A top concern for most kids pastors is reaching the children in their communities who do not attend church. These unchurched kids simply don’t know much about the Bible. Often they have a mixed up version of Jesus gathered from TV shows. Before they can give their lives to Him, they need a basic introduction to the Good News.
On the other end of the spectrum are kids who are overexposed to church..."

Family Unplugged: How Technology Affects Relationships (Breaking Free). "Is technology enhancing or inhibiting our ability to relate to one another? Some scientists believe our wired culture is changing the way we think and behave—and we may be paying too high a price in the relationships that matter..."

For the Young Mother: Ministry, Guilt and Seasons of Life (9Marks) Guilt is a young mother’s habitual shadow. It has a nasty way of soaking through many of her efforts at nurturing, serving and loving others. “Am I doing enough for my children? For others? What do they think of me? What does God think of me?”

Talking with your children about marriage & sex

Talking with your children about marriage & sex (Jay Younts, there are six parts in this series) "One of the more dreaded of parental responsibilities is telling children about sex. This conversation is often so awkward that both parent and child wonder what good could come from it. Sometimes, there is no actual conversation. A parent might hand a book to his or her child and say, "Read this and let me know if you have any questions." There is a degree of irony in this awkwardness. On the one hand, it is almost impossible to avoid being confronted with sex. Movies, billboards, commercials, songs, news reports, casual conversations, TV programs etc., form a cultural bombardment of sexual themes that invade daily life. On the other hand, at least in most Christian households, sex is not talked about as a part of regular family conversation."