Stop Trying to Fix People's Problems

(PROJECT TGM)

 

Sam S. Rainer III serves as president of Rainer Research, a firm dedicated to providing answers for better church health. He also serves as senior pastor at Stevens Street Baptist Church in Cookeville, TN. He writes, speaks, and consults on church health issues. You can connect with Sam on Twitter, or at his blog.

 I once made the mistake of giving my cell number to a suicidal transgender alcoholic. For several nights in a row, I had the privilege of answering my phone at 2:00 AM, only to have the same conversation ending with the same advice: “Stop going to gay bars, getting drunk, and picking fights with drag queens.” My advice was simple. The situation was not.
The mistake was not that I reached out to someone desperate for help. Of that I have no regrets. The mistake I made as a pastor was buying into the perception this person had of me. He thought I was going to “fix it” and give some magical advice to make the pain go away. Of course I shared the gospel. Of course I shared how Jesus heals. But I did little to lower the lofty expectations of my abilities to solve his issues. He believed I could fix it. I played the part. I am a pastor after all. It’s what I do, right?   MORE